Tuesday, April 14, 2015

What is a "Feminist" Anyways?




fem·i·nism
ˈfeməˌnizəm/
noun
  1. the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

One of the latest reads that I was truly inspired by was titled We Should All be Feminist by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.  This was an excerpt of a speech that she gave at TedXEuston.  If you ever listened to Beyonce's song Flawless, there is an intro to the song that was taken from Ngozi's speech.  This speech was given to spread the idea of feminism and why everyone should become a feminist.  

As I was reading this book, I was developing ideas as to why men ridicule women and why the superiority role belongs to males.  Chimamanda talked about how in her home country Nigeria, women were not considered independent and are always to depend on males.  She presented a few scenarios that she was involved in.  One scenario is when she was staying at a hotel.  When she walked through the hotel lobby, a male employee came up to her asking if she was visiting someone (a male), what is the reason for entering the hotel without a male escort, etc.  The male who was asking her these questions was implying that she is possibly a prostitute.  To make the assumption that a woman's reason for entering a hotel is for prostitution is completely absurd.  Why is it that a woman has to be escorted into places by a man?  Women should be allowed to go to places alone.  However, this idea of male supremacy is carved into people's brains, believing that women have to depend on men.  

Another scenario Chimamanda experienced is when she went out to town with a male.  She explained that in Nigeria, specifically in the city, Lagos, that there are people who make money by parking your car.  She continued with the incident, how she gave the man who was parking their car, ten dollars, and the man decided to thank the male who she was with.  Even though she is the one who gave the guy ten dollars of hers, the man did not thank her. Since she is a woman and it was believed that the man who she was with, is the one who provided that ten dollar bill.  This dialogue basically made Chimamanda invisible out of the conversation because she was a female.  It also made it seem like she cannot pay someone with her own money because she has to depend on the male to pay.  Not in every single situation, the male has to pay.  

The adversities of females in today's society is developing more and more each day because people don't believe in the idea of feminism.  Women fought so hard to be equaled to men.  We fought for our rights as women, we fought for our positions, we fought for our freedom, and we fought for our purpose.  What did men ever fight for?  It seems like men were having things handed to them with a silver spoon.  What was given to women without a second guess?  This idea of feminism has to be carved into our minds instead of the societal expectation that men are dominant.  There should not be a superior vs. inferior debate referring to gender.  Women nor men should be dominant over the other gender, in my opinion.  We all should be equal and have an equal outlook on societal expectations of the two genders.  No female should have to be escorted by a man.  No female should have to be doubted or ignored if they offer to pay for a male.  No female should feel ashamed of being a female. 

This idea of mine, developed from this motivational book written by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.  As I explained two scenarios she has experienced dealing with lack of gender equality, I have quoted an excerpt of her speech referring to her experiences of being a female teacher.  What do you ladies think of this social issue?  Do you understand where Chimamanda is coming from based off of what I explained? 

"The first time I taught a writing class in graduate school, I was worried. Not about the teaching material, because I was well prepared and I was teaching what I enjoyed. Instead I was worried about what to wear. I wanted to be taken seriously.  I knew that because I was female, I would automatically have to prove my worth. And I was worried that if I looked too feminine, I would not be taken seriously. I really wanted to wear my shiny lip gloss and my girly skirt, but I decided not to. I wore a very serious, very manly, and very ugly suit.  The sad truth of the matter is that when it comes to appearance, we start off with men as the standard, as the norm. Many of us think that the less feminine a woman appears, the more likely she is to be taken seriously. A man going to a business meeting doesn't wonder about being taken seriously based on what he is wearing—but a woman does.  I wish I had not worn that ugly suit that day. Had I then the confidence I have now to be myself, my students would have benefited even more from my teaching. Because I would have been more comfortable and more fully and truly myself." --Chimamanda Ngoizi Adichie


4 comments:

  1. Your blog was beautifully written Olivia. I can definitely relate to this. Growing up in Nigeria, I saw a lot of incidence in which women were basically undermined which is sad and unfortunate that after so many years there hasn’t been much of a progress when it comes to the issue of men undermining women. I am fortunate to be in the US now and most importantly to be in a school like SVA where I’ve been educated to know that women are not and should not be feel inferior to the male gender, but unfortunately many women don’t have the same opportunity that I had.
    Being raised in a Nigerian household, I am expected do all the cooking and kitchen work because I am a woman and therefore, that is supposed to be my sphere of influence. I am supposed to serve to my brothers (mind you I have four brothers and I am the only girl). I remember the first time I didn’t do what I was supposed to do and basically having my family member basically say that I am becoming Americanize. Educating women on what feminist really is is very important and would inspire women to really start to feel equal to men. IF WOMEN WORK TOGETHER TO FIGHT THIS ISSUE WE CAN ELIMINATE THE OPPRESSION OF WOMEN.

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  2. Before reading this blog I never really thought about how men did not have to fight for their rights. You never saw a men right movement simply because everything was given to them which is not fair. Women are as equal as men. Chimamanda’s speech in Beyonce’s song Flawless talks about how we teach girls to shrink themselves. This is very true because you see many young females nowadays waist training to get that hour glass Kim K figure. Because of society, many females nowadays find it hard to embrace how they really are. Also females should aim to be successful but not too successful because they will threaten the man. Why should the men always be superior?! Why can women be on top?! Coming from an old fashion Caribbean family the question about marriage is always brought up especially by the older family members. My sister, being the oldest grandchild is always being pressured about when she is going to find someone to get married too. At times they ask me when am i going to get married. They feel that since they got married by the age of 16 and got kids at that age that it should be the same today. I completely disagree with that, i always tell my grandparents that my education comes first and i could care less about marriage. Whenever i say that I always get the same response that i need a man to take care of me in the future. I don’t know about anyone else but I don’t need any man to take care of me, I can take care of myself. Thankfully my parents are more understanding than the older generation and feel that my education comes first above all. Females are generally deprived of an education because they are "meant to be in the home." Time has changed but not the mindset of many.

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  3. I feel the same way when it comes down to me having to put myself in a professional setting. I recently had an interview for my college scholarship and I didn't know what to wear. I wanted them to see me as being serious about the scholarship and I wanted to stand out from other candidates. On this day it was hot and i could have worn a dress but instead I found it more appropriate to wear business pants and a blazer. This outfit defiantly made me standout from the other female candidates because they had on dressed while i had on pants. So I can really relate to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.

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  4. I agree with the thoughts presented in your opening paragraph in which you discussed how it was assumed that Chimamanda was a prostitute because she was a woman entering a hotel unescorted by a male. By assuming that she was a prostitute, the male employee is sending the message that a woman can only be virtuous and untainted when a man is by her side. Because a man is not by her side to show her the right path, she must be dangerous and capable of engaging in illicit and promiscuous activity. I think an even bigger point is despite our country's idea that they are better than other nations, we can see the same stereotypes like those of other nations in our own society. Female victims of rape are often questioned on their sexual history and what they may have done to provoke the attack because there is no way men could not engage in criminal behavior without a reason. But does that not show a weakness on a man's end?

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